it truly was and is a fairy tale romance, it was also love at first sight, see she is just so much more than my wife, she is also my soul mate, yes that may sound cliche’ but it’s true, if you are fortunate enough to meet your soul mate you WILL know, your very soul cries out for joy.
back to the fairy tale , the first time I saw her she was just 15 years old, my car crapped out in front of her house, I had a friend with me and while fixing the car I glanced up and saw a blonde angel working in the flower garden, I didn’t know it then but our paths were destined to cross a bit later in life, I made an off handed comment to my friend that someday I was going to marry that girl there, my friend laughed and commented about jail bait, I chuckled at hys comments but something deep within me knew that the girl in the flower garden would someday be my wife.
Fast forward 7 years, the girl in the garden was a mere faded memory, I ran an ad in the local paper for a queer friendly room mate, male, female, somewhere in between, didn’t matter as long as they could pay their share. a couple days pass and I get a knock on the door, I open the door and damn near had a heart attack, there at the door stood that angel from the garden 7 years ago! my heart soared and my soul cried for joy, I rented her the room in a heart beat.
I was dumbstruck and afraid to say or do anything to scare her, I didn’t make a pass flirt or do anything except cook fabulous dinners for her, about 3 months into having her as a room mate, she out of the blue planted a kiss on my lips… and yes my knees did buckle, at that moment we went from room mates to dating.
Now let it be known I am not a hopeless romantic, I am awkward and clumsy and not always sure of myself….she had to initiate the first moves, she had to initiate the bedroom etc. I was never good with dating and was and am not a player, I’m actually quite quiet and reserved.
But she had me hook line and sinker, I’d do anything for her, thankfully she likes the simple things in life.
The government listed us as common law 6 months into our relationship, we made it legal after being together just over 1 year, our anniversary is February 14th…believe it or not that is pure coincidence , it wasn’t planned, it just happened.
we talked about having a kid, I knew damn well that I wasn’t going to be a Mom, it’s just not in me to be THAT kind of parent, nope I am way to Butch to even entertain such a thought ( read chicken shit into that) 4 years into our marriage I figured out and arranged (with her consent) for her to get pregnant, no fuss no muss no strings attached, it was fast easy and didn’t cost a dime.
9 months later my wife gave birth to a 8lb baby boy, who I nick named Hammy (Hamster) Now my wife is a great Mom, she certainly was born to be a Mom, and our son looks just like her, he has my temper though lol, our son grew up calling me Dad, now at age 12 he still calls me Dad.
My wife is such an amazing woman, she is very passionate about life, she is a very kind caring person, the type who hugs strangers upon meeting them, she is a person that people want to open up too, she was a daycare teacher for 16 years and just last year decided to switch careers and become a cook…and she did.
I have had 17 glorious , wonderful, passionate years with her, and everyday I wake up, thank God, and fall in love with her all over again.
Now things have changed in our lives, I still fall in love every day with her, I now pray to God for 1 more day with her, I’m a deeply devoted hersband , I stopped working this year to take care of my Wife, you see she has stage 4 lung cancer, it’s a rare aggressive cancer called synovial sarcoma, there is no cure, at most she has 3 months to a year left, and I will be at her side all the way to the bitter end
Gone are the days of her laughter , our camping and hiking trips, our special time together, gone is the twinkle in her eyes and her mischievous smirk, now it’s a struggle for her to breathe, the color has faded from her skin and she has a profound sadness about her.
I do what I can for her, administer her meds, make sure her oxygen is flowing, bathe her, whisper sweet nothings in her ear, and tell her it’s okay to let go, that Hammy and I will be ok.
It’s just so hard, she turned 40 in January, she was full of life then, excited about our summer vacation plans, that all changed abruptly in less than 2 months. it’s not right, my wife never ever smoked, never drank, never did drugs and she gets struck down by an insidious cancer.
I’m sorry I have to stop here for now, the pain and heart ache I feel is just too much, I will continue in another post as soon as I can.
Do me a favor, hug your loved ones and express your love for them often
Butch
easy wood projects to build
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