Then came the 8 rounds of Chemo, she was very very sick and very nearly died a few times, and my blog began to reflect that, I began to blog more and more about my wife and how brave and strong she was (I am telling you now, I doubt I have the Cajones to undergo 1 round of chemo, never mind 8 !!), I blogged about our life with cancer and still had great hope that we could beat this insidious disease, many of my posts were filled with cautious optimism, and my blog reflected that.
Now my wife has passed, the emptiness I feel in my very soul consumes me, I grieve hard, some days are good, most are pretty bad, and now my blog reflects that, I write about my grief, I share my loss, I let it be known that I am broken, I also write about the good days, the days when I do smile, the blogs and comments that make me actually laugh, yes laugh and brighten my day, and my blog reflects that.
I blog honest and unfiltered, I let my grief be known, I know there are many folks in my exact situation, or have been in my situation, who had and have to walk griefs path, and it’s a lonely journey and many have, are and will take that lonely journey, I know this because I do follow a few blogs whose author’s are in the midst of their own lonesome journey down griefs path, sometimes our paths cross or seem to run parallel , yet even if we were standing next to each other on our own paths, looking each other in the eye , we’d still be very much alone, I blog open and honestly and unfiltered as do they, in hopes that others who know grief will find us and know that even though we are each on our very own lonely journey, we truly are not alone, there are others, many others like me, just walking this path and waiting to come across another who may need a kind word, or a simple acknowledgement that yes, they do exist and we who grieve see and know and share their pain, perhaps we walk with them awhile to be sure they are okay, to let them know that though it doesn’t feel like it, life does go on, we,the ones left behind must go on and never give up, and I hope my blog reflects that.
I blog for the lovers and couples and the romantic people, I want to share the love I had and still have for my wife, I loved her then, I love her now,I will love her always until the end of time and beyond, I want people to know that true pure love exists, many many folks have it and don’t even realize what they have, i want to gently remind folks to stop being so busy with the business of life and take time, quality time to spend with those they love, for tomorrow is not a promise or guarantee, it may never come for some….then what? I want to gently remind folks to just hug those they love, to tell them that they are loved, let them know just how much they are truly loved, and to never assume that the others know that they are loved. my blog has become a cautionary true story and I hope everyone realizes how important it is to really communicate with those they love so god forbid something happens,there is no guilt of things left unsaid,that there is no “could of” “should of” “would of” left behind, what in life could possibly be so important that it takes precedence over those you love and your families? live each day as though it was your last…. what would you want to say to your love? your family? if you were not going to be here tomorrow what would you say to them? would they know in their hearts and very soul that you loved them? and I hope my blog reflects that.
this blog hopefully gently reminds people to be kind to others, your simple smile, a nod of your head, a kind word, may just mean the entire world to another person, dropping a few coins in a homeless persons cup, or buying them some food, giving them an old jacket or blanket, or any sort of kindness shown towards them, may just mean the world to them, your kindness towards others is worth more than all the material things and wealth in the world, your simple acknowledgement be it a smile or kind gesture to that stranger may make the difference between them living and dying, we all have our own stories, some good, some horrific, some filled with grief and sorrow, we don’t know each others story, it is not written on our clothes for others to see and read, it is not broadcast on our own individual radio station that anyone can hear,it is not automatically send out via texts, it is not something we automatically know, we each have our own story so be kind to others you most likely do not know their story or what they are going through, that kindness makes a big difference in a persons life, even if you doubt it had any effect. and I hope my blog reflects that.
well that’s about all I have to say about my blog and the direction I hope it’s going, hopefully soon I will have something happy or at least something to make you smile as you read to blog about, we shall see… I can’t see into the future, even 1 day, so I have no idea what the next post shall be about.
Remember folks:express your love often,never take tomorrow for granted, and be kind to others.
Butch
easy wood projects to build
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