Another thing I do is use humour, sometimes one liners or jokes, but mostly things that I find funny , for instance , every third sunday of each month the village church holds a service, yes I attend even though I am more spiritual than anything, I figure it can’t hurt and I am generally intrigued and interested by the true believers, I mean the ones who “feel” the spirit and cry or whoop it up in the isles, this fascinates me to no end, but what I do in church , other than observe others, is find a pew with an elderly man or woman sitting alone, I sit at the far end so as not to disturb their worship, then , when the time is right, Rip a Hippo ! (Pass gas/fart), it rumbles down the pew nice and loud, then I fake a startled look and stare right at the elderly person at the far end !….. okay so it’s a bit mean but it is funnier than hell to watch everyone try to maintain their composure , and I come away looking innocent as all hell while trying not to piss myself laughing. I have done this only once, you don’t wanna do it more than once or they will figure out who the gasser truly is, meanwhile my poor wife is shooting daggers out her eyes at me and looks mortified and our son is on the floor with his fist in his mouth trying not to laugh his piddly ass off, as the poor reverend tries in vain to carry on as normal.
My best stuff comes at the hospital though, thankfully the nurses and staff at the Cancer center are quite used to me now, I used humor to put them at ease when it comes to physical appearance , the first time my wife was in the hospital the poor staff on the first day didn’t know how to address me, are you the husband?? I I I mean wife?? oh hell are you her partner? ( this alone was amusing to me watching them squirm trying to identify me), so I replied I would be her hersband, or husband if it is easier for you , so that is what I am listed as at the hospital, her husband.
The following day when I went to visit my wife, I dressed up as cousin IT from the addams family and gave the nurses and staff a good laugh, and to show them that yes the whole situation the previous day neither offended or hurt me, and that it is okay to laugh at the situation, now the staff just call me by name, and I always make sure to have a corny joke to tell them , I figure the cancer ward has got to be a stressful place to work and I know it’s stressful for my wife to be there during chemo so I always try to cheer her and the staff up.
Speaking of hospitals , the cancer ward is on the third floor, so I like to head to the top floor 6th , then push all the buttons and jump off as everyone is piling on , then I run down the stairs take my ball cap off and put on some shades , beat the elevator to the next floor and stand in front of the door with my arms crossed, I do this on every floor, by the time the people get to the second floor they’re all like wtf!! and hammering on the elevator buttons , when it finally gets to the cafeteria in the basement, I am sitting in a chair no shades and wearing my ball cap , looking as innocent as can be .
I have also been known to toss random stuff in other people’s shopping carts, sure theres the old condoms in the elderly ladies shopping cart gag, but that’s pretty old, still funny but old, no I like to mess with vegetarians, I am a people watcher so it’s pretty easy to spot the vegetarians in the grocery store, they can usually be found grazing the organic isles and no meat of any kind in their carts, I have noticed that tofu bacon packaging is similar to regular bacon brands, both can have the bright blue markers or red or yellow etc, so I swap em out when the person isn’t looking, I’ll take their tofu and replace it with meat, then replace someones meat with the tofu and cause total chaos and mayhem at the tills .
It is pretty common for me to wear a sponge clown nose, when I am in the city, if I pull up beside another car I will stick on the nose and look at the car beside me and wave, it usually gets a laugh or s snicker from the passengers, and kids start pointing and carrying on, so I look away and take the nose off then look back at them with a puzzled look, they are usually perplexed so I look away again and put the nose back on and wave , smile and drive away .
I know it may seem childish or downright jerkish to some, but humour even at the expense of myself or others helps me cope with all the hurt and suffering of my wifes cancer, it often brightens another persons day just to see some silliness in an otherwise hectic day.
Here is a corny joke you can do with your friends or kids, it’s family friendly and so corny that you will get a laugh out of someone, simply proclaim loudly to who ever that you can breathe under water, then prove it by standing under a glass of water and take a deep breath, see you did breathe under water!
Guess that’s all for now , remember folks, express your love often, never take tomorrow for granted and be kind to others .
Butch
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